Thursday, March 29, 2007

Some People Get It

Tuesday we were at a staff meeting where yet another teacher announced she was pregnant (12 for the year now!). Again, my heart broke as the number 12 ran through my head several times. I am happy for this person as she has been through infertility. But the "it was an accident" part cut to the heart. Everyone clapped and cheered. It was a happy occasion.. I guess. Tears welled up I quickly blotted them away so no one could see my sadness during the cheering. I didn't want to take away from her happiness or have people think I wasn't happy for her, so as always, I tuck my emotions deep within my heart and hide.
One person. Just one. thought of me and took the time to let me know they thought of me.

I came back up to my office after the meeting was over and on my chair at my desk was this note along with a bag of peanut M-n-M's. I totally lost it. Somebody gets it. This isn't a person that I typically share my deepest inner feelings with but it is someone with whom I have discussed my infertility and adoption. She has shared with me before that her sister also went through infertility and as a last ditch effort - they took a box of chocolate ice cream down to the nuns at the Discalced Carmelite Nun Monastery (read about the history of these nuns HERE - not the same ones as in my home town but just to give you an idea) and wrote them a note asking them to pray for her. And in a very short time - she was pregnant! Now - I will not get pregnant - as that has been nixed medically as a possibility. But I could go offer up some ice cream and see if they will pray for Mia to come home quickly!

Anyway, sometimes it is just good to know that there are people out there who really "get it". People who understand that, even though you are not physically crying your eyes out every day, you are still aching on the inside. Thank God for people who take the time to write you a note and give you a bag of M-n-M's so that you can sit in your pool of self pity for a little bit and cry. I really needed those M-n-M's!

16 comments:

Teri said...

It's the little gestures of sincerity that can touch heart in such a special way.

I'm glad someone was able to do that for you today.

Lisa and Doug said...

I am so glad someone was able to lift your spirits a little today.

I can't tell you how many pregnancy announcements that I have endured over the years. It hurts every single time. Oh, I just got the one where the 22 year old unmarried daughter of a co-worker of mine found out she was pregnant with twins. She can't even take care of herself, much less two babies! That was a doozy!

Just remember that you are an expectant mom too! Just like this pregnant woman! You just don't have to buy maternity clothes!

Dawn and Dale said...

WOW! What an amazing post!!

I bet it took that someone a whole 2 minutes to write that note and leave the m&m's on your desk, yet look how significant and amazing it was to YOU (and me....so many miles away!)

Truly it goes to show you that nothing is "too little" when you are giving to someone!!! AND to follow your instincts!! That "someone" you are thinking of today may just need to know that!!

Thanks for sharing this today Sara!!

I'm praying for Mia too!!

Blessings,

Dawn

PromiseKeepersDaughter said...

I'm glad someone thought of you too. I was at a baby shower last night for a lady at our church and out of the 11 pregnancies there are 5 of us left, someone listed who was next then the next after that ect....they forgot to mention me ....again....but one lady who wasn't in on the conversation piped up and said to me from across the room " Can't wait to go to your baby shower Deb" then she winked at me. Made me feel like a zillion bucks!

Doris & Dan said...

It is the little things that help and make all the difference in the world.

Keep smilin!

Valeri said...

(((HUGS))) Small thoughtful gestures like that are worth a million bucks.They mean the world to me, too! I've been through the same situations at work for the past couple of years and it NEVER gets easier. What pains me most is when our students (who can't even take care of themselves) get pregnant. It seems so freakin' easy for the rest of the world, eh? I think we could co-author one heck of a book about the ups and downs of our journey to parenthood.

tracy said...

Such a small gesture and yet so huge in it's meaning. I'm glad she was there to lift you back up.

Lisa said...

I cried when I read your post. I so know how you feel. I glad that you have someone who is there for you.

Alyson & Ford said...

Love surround you.
Peace be with you.

Thanks for sharing...

Beth said...

I can so relate after so many years I would have thought that I would be immune but it still gets me sometimes.

M&Ms and a kleenex.....priceless.

Kramer said...

Sara,
I cried as I read your post as I have been in those shoes many time and felt that no one really understood how I feel. I feel selfish and guilty when I think about myself during these times of happiness of others but I know it is only natural. I am so happy that someone "got it"! Thanks for sharing your moment.
BTW, thank you so much for always taking care of my blog. Maybe one day I will learn how it works!
Kim

Lee-Anne said...

I'll echo her words. "You and hubs WILL have Mia Lin in your arms one day"... although - I'd change the one day, to SOON. I'm still feverently believing it WILL be this year.

Emmie said...

That was very touching! It must be tough but think...if it weren't for all this and you had been able to have children where would Mia be? Would she have parents and a home waiting for her? Sometimes it's hard to believe but everything happens for a reason and God has a plan and reason for all this!! Hang in there!

Mom-of-5 said...

That was very nice of her. See there are good folks out there. You are entitled to LARGE bag !!
It really will happen- Mia will come home and you will be a great mommy.

Kristine and Shawn said...

What a wonderfully kind person. Unless they have been through this, people just don't get it. Sometimes it is hard to hold that pasted on grin when yet "another happy couple" announce their pregnancy. Had a few tears for you reading this but we wll be there soon too!!!

Jonni said...

What a touching thing to do. It's just so nice when someone does the simplest thing to say "I am thinking of you".

Hugs,
Jonni
:)